Sucks

Last night our friends came over and we watched playoff hockey all night. It was really awesome. We drank and had a good time.

But, I fucked everything up. When everyone left, Him and I were going to have sex, but then we didn't because I was too sick and drunk. Well, one thing led to another and I started hitting him and we beat each other up pretty badly. Then, he said it was over again. So, here I am trying to prove to him I can change. I can be different. I can love him. I can be a good person. I am just so fucked up, but that doesnt mean I should lose him. That doesnt meant I should lose everything I love and need..I will be different. I will. Its not like I need him bc I am codependent. He is the one for me. I know he is i know he is.


You, you are the one for me.
You, you are all I see.
Me, I am not pretty.
Me, I am so ugly.
You, you are so amazing and pure.
Me, I am messed up and dirty.
You, you are the one I need.